Illusion ( part 5) - Teacher, Guru and Universal Intelligence

In the various posts to date on illusion we have now examined that what ever we perceive is erroneous, our understanding of happiness itself is illusory, our desires and thoughts are also illusory. In fact everything that appears is illusory, as it continually changes and has infinite possibilities. So the question arises, how do we navigate through this illusion, especially if all that appears is not as it seems and is impermanent ?.

 

We often hear people talk about teachers, mentors, guides, gurus, masters and divine beings as beings that can help navigate through the illusion.

 

Are they all different names for teachers or guides ?

 

No, in fact these are all different roles suitable in different situations.

 

So what is the difference ?

 

Colloquially speaking people use these terms interchangeably, however usually a teacher is associated with teaching a certain skillset, or a certain technique. These skillsets are usually measurable and have a defined outcome. Examples include studying at school or for a vocation or at university, etc.

 

A guide or a mentor is a more loosely defined coaching setup for guidance or advisory purposes only. Usually a mentor has achieved what the mentee is looking to achieve and the mentor provides coaching and guidance based on their experiences.

 

The actual definition of a guru is someone who takes a person from darkness to light. Colloquially speaking it implies someone who has mastered a discipline or a field. However in the context of spirituality it is someone who helps a person realise their true self. The term master is also sometimes interchangeably used with a guru. Usually gurus and masters deal with non-physical, non mental realms of practice and are less focussed on teaching skills or techniques as an end goal, but more as a stepping stone to help a being realise their true self.

 

How can I find a guru or a master that can make me realise my true nature ?

 

Normally one goes and looks for a teacher, a guide or a mentor based on their expertise, qualifications, experience and reputation. However all such measures fail when searching for a guru or a master, because the true worth of guru can not be comprehended by the intellect of a normal person or a seeker.

 

So how can I find the right guru ?

 

You don't find the right guru, the right guru always finds you when you are ready. This may sound very illogical, however this has been the experience of countless seekers and gurus and masters themselves. When the time is right, the seeker is ready, the right guru, the right path will unfold. All that is required is an open mind from the seeker, with a strong desire to find the truth or find the self and the right guru will appear.

How do I know I have found the right guru ? 

There are some signs that a seeker can observe such as (this is not a complete list) -

• The guru is found as a result of a coincident, but rarely as a result of personal effort.
• The true guru / master will always urge a seeker to trust their direct experience and discourage a seeker to blindly follow them or anyone. 
• In a seeker's journey with the guru, a number of coincidental situations will arise or some call it miracles begin to occur. Examples include when you have questions, doubts or confusion, without prompting, the guru will provide you answers, what you need will begin to happen (not what you desire).
• As the seeker evolves, they do not need to speak or ask and the path starts unfolding, people appear in their lives that help the seeker on their journey. No effort is required on behalf of the seeker other than following the directions of a guru.
• There comes a point that the seeker may feel that the guru is consorting with the entire universe to help the seeker evolve. This is a beautiful experience, but will occur at a stage where the seeker has achieved a sufficient level of surrender. 

Who is guiding the guru to find the seeker ?

 

A seeker seeks a guru for guidance, similarly a guru may seek his / her guru for their own guidance and a universal intelligence, sometimes referred to as the Gurufield or the divine intelligence. Gurus that have realised their true nature have already established this connection with the universal intelligence and as such their every action is being guided by this intelligence. This intelligence is continually guiding the gurus and the seekers to come together. 

Once a seeker has found their guru, they may continue to be with their guru, till they have realised their true nature or the work of the guru is complete. In this process a guru may introduce the seeker to the universal intelligence so that continual guidance from the guru is not required.

 

What is this universal intelligence and why can't I access it directly instead of looking for a guru first ?

 

The universal intelligence is the intelligence that pervades across all beings, is infinite and is the intelligence within which all masters, gurus and beings, past, present and future emanate from and dissolve. It is the source of all knowledge that has been and can ever be conceived.

 

This universal intelligence can be accessed by anyone and everyone, however the body mind structure requires a certain level of purity to be able to access and understand this intelligence. This purification process as well as the removal of ignorance is what a guru will assist a seeker with so the seeker realises their true nature and can comprehend this intelligence.

Another way of looking at this is that most people are so identified with their body mind structure and their egoic identity that they cannot perceive anything but from this egoic perspective. To connect to the universal intelligence, a seeker needs to override the egoic identity and replace it with surrender. This almost always requires intervention and guidance from a guru or a master. 

Kabir Das a 15th century Indian mystic and saint summed this up in one of his poems.

Guru Govind dou khade, kake lagoon paay,

Balihari guru aapno, Govind diyo batay

It means that if a guru and the divine are standing in front of you, who should one bow to first. One should first bow to the guru who shows the way to the divine, or in other words without guru access to the divine is not possible.

 

How do I know that I have access to the universal intelligence ?

To access the gurufield or the universal intelligence, the seeker needs to be in a state of selfless surrender, which is also called the state of presence or being. This is the natural state, no effort is required to be in this state, however lifetimes of conditioning and ignorance has hidden this state under the egoic identity. When you are in this state of being, the egoic identity disappears and instead the being then becomes an instrument of the universal intelligence. A clear indication of this connection is when a seeker reflects on their actions later on in this state, they are amazed at what they said, what they did as something beyond their own intelligence. It is as if a greater power took control of their body mind structure and said or did things that later appear to be impossible for the body mind structure or the egoic identity to comprehend. These are just some pointers, given seekers can often imagine this connection, as the egoic identity can be very strong in some, hence it is best to first find a guru who can guide a seeker through this process or make the connection. 

 

Can I have multiple gurus at the same time ?

 

Technically there is nothing stopping one from having multiple gurus at the same time, however lets examine this in more detail. This question originates from the view point that you can have multiple teachers at the same time teaching you multiple topics as it is in the school, so it should be possible to have multiple gurus at the same time. However the difference as we have seen is that a teacher is teaching different skills and as long as the skills do not overlap, it does not matter. For example you can be learning tennis, cricket, swimming all from different teachers, there is no issue as the skills trained for, largely, do not overlap. But if you went to two different teachers to learn cricket and they give you conflicting advice, then there will be confusion. Similarly following directions from multiple gurus at the same time will only result in confusion, when there is conflicting advice. Even when the spiritual path followed is different, there will be conflict, as the goal on all the spiritual paths is the same.

 

Can a guru make me realise my true nature ?

 

No, no one can make you realise who you already are. But a guru can help you remove the ignorance that is covering up your true nature. A guru can point you to the knowledge or to your true nature, but the realisation of the self only occurs through removal of ignorance and contemplation on the essential knowledge. The guru is like the sun that is always shining, but it is for the seeker to seek the light of the sun and remove the ignorance.

 

What is the best way to seek a gurus guidance ?

 

A guru's grace is always shining like the sun, however to tap into it a seeker needs to approach the guru with an open mind with complete surrender. In this state the seeker becomes the most receptive to the guru's guidance.

 

Does that mean I must blindly follow what a guru says ?

 

No not really. One must still question what the guru says and use their own intellect and discrimination to incorporate what the guru says into a seeker's life. For example, in a group setting, the guru might stress the importance of practices to cultivate prolonged states of attention, however a seeker has to understand that this is a generic advice to beginners and a more targeted advice is required based on an individual interaction with the guru for the seeker. So everything that the guru is saying must be assessed, evaluated and then applied. On the other hand though, questioning everything that the guru says is the other extreme and detrimental to one's spiritual progress.

 

So how can I strike the right balance ?

 

Firstly there should be a strong level of trust between the seeker and the guru. This trust is fundamental to receiving and benefitting from the guru's guidance. To establish this trust initially, a seeker may need to ask a number of questions and discriminate everything that the guru says, but once a level of basic trust is developed, the right balance is automatically found.  It is very important to remember that developing trust or even respecting the guru is not the same as worshipping a guru. In fact quite the opposite, one of the worst things a seeker can do is start worshipping a guru and treat everything that is said by the guru as gospel. When this happens, the context, the intent, the audience and applicability of the message from the guru is lost and replaced with blind faith. This can lead to errors in adopting a guru's message meant for other seeker(s) causing confusion.

In summary, a guru is essential on a spiritual path and a seeker does not need to find a guru, the right guru appears when the seeker is ready. When the right guru appears, the seeker just needs to surrender to make the most of the guru's grace and guidance. 

Illusion ( part 4) - Thoughts, Intentions and Feelings

 

All that is perceived is continually changing and an illusion. Thoughts and feelings too are one of the illusory forms, which we will explore today.

On a typical day a person thinks anywhere between 6,000 to 70,000 thoughts.  There is a viewpoint that 70 - 80% of these thoughts are negative. Our experience does tell us that anything negative appears to trigger the flight or fight response of the body mind structure and hence the human mind is more conditioned to take notice of negative thoughts. Hence the fear that something might be more relevant to our survival and may require a emergency response automatically prioritises negative over positive.

 

Another commonly held viewpoint is that thoughts expend energy, the more you think, the more tired you get, which is no surprise that when you are in deep sleep your day to day thoughts are absent and you expend the least amount of energy. It can also be observed from direct experience that absence of thoughts in deep sleep also refreshes the mind and the body.

 

Thoughts can be about anything, but intention creates focussed thoughts, which in turn leads to actions and feelings, repetitive actions become a habit and a habit becomes a set of values which in turn becomes your destiny.

 

Thoughts do one other thing within us. They impact our physiology by impacting the hormonal balance in our body. This in turn creates emotions and feelings and these impact the way we behave. For example a sudden release of endorphins makes you happy compared to a release of adrenaline and noradrenaline when you are angry. These hormones then affect the way your various body organs react. For instance when you are angry your heart starts beating faster, your blood pressure changes, your breath becomes shorter, etc. One single thought can have a massive impact on the physiology of your body. Sustained thinking can permanently impact your physiology to a point you may develop chronic pain in parts of your body.

Excessive thinking of the past (which can not be changed) is a major contributor of depression and excessive thinking of the future is a major contributor of anxiety. 

 

If your thoughts can have such a big impact on you and your life, isn't it important to learn how we can manage them.

 

Based on the above we can see all these impacts are a direct result of your thoughts or habits encountering an external or internal trigger point. It is clear external trigger points are not in your control. So the only thing you can manage are your thoughts and your habits.

 

So how to do this?

 

Thoughts are very subtle and hard to monitor. For instance one random thought about food can lead to a chain reaction of thoughts and next thing you know you are salivating thinking about something you ate years back.

Thoughts come in clusters, thoughts are normal and natural, excessive thoughts can make you addicted to thinking. In particular the major impact of thoughts is that they result in unwanted actions and feelings.

How can I manage thoughts and feelings ?

One of the ways to manage thoughts is to watch them come and go and not get carried away with them. The moment you shine the light of awareness on thoughts they disappear. For this one of the most essential ingredients is acceptance of thoughts as they are. If you try to change or control them or suppress them you then get attached to them and can no longer watch them in an aware state.  Initially it may be hard to watch thoughts, so it may be better to start cultivating the practice of witnessing or watching with something more grosser like feelings and desires.

 

A similar process applies to feelings. If you are feeling pain or anger, just observing it makes it disappear. The trick is you need to be aware of what you are feeling. As feelings are more gross then thoughts, it is much easier to observe them.

As you observe feelings you begin to realise that feelings collect other feelings, as well as they result from unresolved thoughts. For example if you are feeling pain because of a broken relationship, now if you have a physical pain, it too adds to your relationship pain and together they create a collective mass of pain. So any new pain you feel starts collecting with already existing pain. Over time you become a collection point for pain unless you accept and clear the pain backlog. This holds true for other emotions such as anger, fear, anxiety, etc.

But feelings of pain appear to be so real, how can I avoid them ?

To avoid collecting emotions you need to be conscious and aware. To remove collected emotions you need to simply watch them and accept them for what they are.

 

One practice that works well is on a daily basis just pick a time perhaps before you go to bed to reflect on how aware you were during the day of your emotions and your thoughts and what if any learnings you had that can be applied to the next day. During the practice assess if there have been any new emotional backlogs that have been generated as a result of actions or thoughts carried out without awareness during the day. This will ensure emotional backlogs are kept to a minimum and emotional collections during the day are promptly cleared.

 

You can always use the five step process of Intention, Attention, Observation, Awareness and Contemplation for understanding desires, to understand feelings as well.

 

Can you reduce the number of thoughts ?

 

There are many different techniques that have been employed by seekers for thousands of years, below are listed some of the common ones -

• Anything you shine the light of awareness on, will disappear, so being aware of one's thoughts not only detaches one from the thoughts but also gradually sees the thoughts fizzle away as one becomes present in the here and now.

• Another technique that has been used for centuries by zen masters is the practice of zazen which is meditative technique used for deep contemplation and eventually emptying the mind of thoughts. There are many resources that can provide instructions on the practice, one of which can be found here.

• Another set of techniques which are based on Yogic principles focus on intense physical activity or breathing activity, which are built to a certain crescendo and then stopped, then suddenly silences the mind. These practices are followed by those on the path of energies, hence can cause significant side effects if practiced in the absence of a qualified Guru.

• One practice that is more suited to people on the devotional path is the practice of chanting a mantra. This practice whilst followed by many people, does not silence the mind if it is carried out in autopilot mode. Any mantra that is picked for chanting, has a certain intonation and a certain meaning. Chanting the mantra and with a focus on the meaning is enough to get a persons mind silenced. Quality is more important than quantity. There are certain base or beej (seed) mantras which when chanted result in instant emptying of mind (internal purification is required to achieve this).

• One of the simplest practices is the practice of attention on a single activity or single tasking (as opposed to multi-tasking), which ensures that one enters a meditative state of being one with the activity being carried out. This ensures one becomes immediately present. Initially this practice can be started with in-posture attention on an object, gradually applied to day to day activities and eventually can result in complete emptying of the mind and oneness with the activity or object of attention. 

• Another strategy that works is time boxing the required thinking. For example allocating a certain time for daily planning or time boxing work related thoughts to weekdays only between certain times. This ensures that unnecessary thoughts especially those that lead to anxiety or depression are reduced and the thinking becomes focussed and targeted.  

What are the impacts of reduced thoughts ?

 

As we know the more the number of thoughts, more energy we expend and more likely we are to create unwanted feelings, impact on the physiology of our body and generate negativity. Reduction in thoughts leads to sharpening of the intellect, clarity of purpose in life, manifestation of one's desires and intentions (that which you want begins to happen) and above all return to the state of being and oneness, which is the natural state of every person.

Once thoughts are managed, just having a strong intention has been known to cure physical ailments, manifest wealth, expedite spiritual progress and bring all that appears as illusory into the seeker's control if the seeker so desires.

 

In summary intentions, thoughts and feelings are the fundamental illusory forms that are the key building blocks that can transform a seeker. Managing them effectively not only makes an individual optimise their survival activities as well as speeds up the individual's spiritual progress and knowledge of the illusion, leading to a life free from suffering.

Illusion ( part 3) - Desires

 

We all have desires, desire for that exotic holiday, desire for that house by the beach, desire for that coveted job, desire to be famous, desire to be loved, desire to be respected, desire to be rich. The list of desires is endless.

So what is a desire and how are they created ?

The dictionary describes desire as a strong wish or a strong feeling for something to happen.

The above is how we understand a desire to be once our mind perceives the wishing, the wanting or the craving. Every being is created with a set of desires that helps the being survive (desires of hunger, thirst, etc which we will call as the survival desires) and a set of desires for evolution of the being (desires that propagate the evolution and procreation of the being). Across the plant and animal kingdom, the human species has the most complex and refined set of survival and evolution desires, which are continually being adapted to meet the environmental context.

In addition to the survival and evolution desires, desires can also be created whenever an action (action can be a physical or a mental action) is performed. This is the nature of existence in the physical world as we see it. Every action creates a potential for a desire(s) to fulfil the reaction(s) of the action. As a result every human being is born with a set of desires collected from past actions that may appear in the present lifetime or a future lifetime based on how conducive the present environment is for their fulfilment. The desires that are conducive to being fulfilled in the present life of a being are sometimes known as the destiny of a being or the purpose of one's present life.

If every action I take has a potential for the creation of a desire, can others actions also create desires for me ? What are the different types of desires ?

 The short answer is yes. Desires can be broken up into three main categories -

 

1. My inherent desires. We have already seen two types of these in the form of desires for survival (hunger, thirst, rest, etc) and desires for evolution (reproduction, continuous improvement, optimisation). The third sub category of my inherent desires are desires borne out of my past actions or thoughts. These could be as a result of choices or decisions that one has made about various aspects of life, for example living in a certain suburb, building a house, getting into relationships, having children. All of these actions provide options and choices and consequently a desire to choose one of them or not to choose.

 

2. My adopted desires. These are desires a person has adopted from others as a result of their influence or as a result of the influence of their environment. Once adopted, these are treated as ones own desires. A person who has lived their childhood in poverty may have a strong desire for wealth when they grow up. Even though the desire for wealth never existed when they were born, but the scarcity in the childhood created a desire to overcome the scarcity. Similarly when one of your friends who you admire buys that beautiful branded handbag or a watch, a desire to have a similar handbag or a watch is created in you. Like this we are continuously adopting desires from others without even knowing it.

 

3. Desires that others have of me or imposed on me. These are desires that others or society has that relate to how they expect you to behave, act or even think. These can also be called as expectations that others have of us. Examples include expectations that parents have of their children. At times parents have been unable to achieve certain desires of their own related to their career or sports and they impose these desires on their children, wishing their children will fulfil these for them. There are desires that a spouse may have of their partner about gifts, money, behaviour, etc.

It must be noted that most people live their lives completely oblivious of their desires.

How does it matter if one is oblivious of their desires, don't desires give you something to live for and those that are fulfilled make you happy ?

If a person is unaware of the nature of their desires and their origin, then one can easily lead their life chasing other people's desires, which may lead to lack of contentment or frustration due to unfulfilled desires. The other consequence of following or adopting others desires is that you become a doormat, with no independent thinking of your own, completely controlled by others. The end result is you feel unhappy and unfulfilled as your desires are never addressed and are supressed or de-prioritised. At some point suppressed desires will surface creating an emotional storm, potentially damaging yourself and your relationships.

So how can I become aware of my desires versus someone else's desires that I have adopted ?   

In order to discern between the different types of desires, it is first important to first have the ability to witness and observe a desire and then determine their source or whether the desire is yours or adopted by you.

Let us say Jack has a fear of small closed confined places and this creates an intense desire to avoid closed confined spaces (claustrophobia). To find out more about this desire the following steps can be followed -

 

1. Intention. Have a strong intent of what you want to achieve, such as which desire you want to focus on, what you want to know about the desire such as the source, how it manifests in your life, the impact on your life and so on. You may want to be aware of the desire every time it manifests. Jack first creates a strong and clear intention of finding out how claustrophobia has come into his life and be aware of it whenever he feels this fear of avoiding closed spaces.

 

2. Attention. Once the intent is clear take your attention to the specific desire that you are interested in. Exclude all other thoughts about other desires. Jack focuses his attention on his desire to avoid closed spaces, but also discovers there are many times when he is in closed spaces and he is distracted and this fear does not exist.

 

3. Observation. Once you have the ability to pin point a desire through your intention and attention, you can observe it in action. The more sharper the ability to observe desires in action, the more easier it becomes to distinguish between desires. Jack observes his desire in action in multiple scenarios and situations.

 

4. Awareness. There comes a point wherein the act of observing, creates an awareness of all that is observed and in this context all the desires. Jack is now immediately aware of his desire to be free from claustrophobia and when it is triggered. His awareness makes him aware of the triggers and the fear even before it has manifested.

 

5. Contemplation. With refined awareness comes the ability to perceive desires in their true form and reflecting on the desires provides insights as to their origin. Contemplating on the scenarios in which the fear is triggered, how it is triggered provides Jack insight into an adverse childhood experience he had when he was locked in a cupboard and he panicked. All of a sudden the source of that fear is known and reflecting on it allows him to reconcile and accept the fear and the desire to avoid it in future.

Once the above steps are practiced a few times, they become muscle memory and just like Jack one becomes aware of the desire and its source and finds a means to fulfil them or accept them. For people who have realised their true self and are continually in awareness, the above steps are automatically happening in autopilot and the source of their desires is revealed to them.

Whilst Jack discovered the root cause or the source of his fear through contemplation, however there is another crude technique that can be used for finding the root cause of ones desires. This is called the five whys technique. Lets take an example.

Jill has this innate desire to say yes to everyone, her partner Jack, her boss at work and her friends. This creates enormous challenges and conflicts for Jill as she is not able to deliver on what she has agreed with everyone around her making her feel inadequate.

Jill uses this five whys technique, wherein she asks herself why questions till she arrives at a possible root cause.

 

1. Why do I say yes to every request people have of me ?

Perhaps I want to be on the good side of everyone.

 

2. Why do I want to be on the good side of everyone ?

I feel I am letting people down and I am concerned what they will think of me.

 

3. Why am I concerned what they will think of me ?

Perhaps I feel I am not good enough for everyone around me if I don't please them.

 

4. Why don't I feel good enough to be my natural self ?

There was a time when I spoke what I felt and hurt my sister by being honest. So I should try to say yes and please people.

 

As can be seen the five whys technique allows one to objectively find out the root cause for simple desires. Used in conjunction with the five steps of intention, attention, observation, awareness and contemplation, this technique can be quite insightful in understanding ones desires.

Ok I know now how to watch my desires and find their source, but how do I control them or how do I get rid of them ?

Controlling desires or suppressing them is not a good idea. In this regard a popular saying is quite apt "that which you resist will persist". Once a desire, its many forms, how it is triggered is known, accepting it for what it is, is required. Desires that are not accepted or subdued or suppressed, will come back stronger than they ever have been. Similarly trying to get rid of desires results in the desires getting stronger. So the natural question is what can be done or rather what should be done with them ?.

Till now we have gone through various techniques to understand a desire, when it manifests and whether it is ours or adopted or imposed on us. The best outcome with respect to a desire is to manage it.

 How do I manage a desire or desires ?

The first step in managing desires is acknowledging and accepting them for what they are. They are natural, necessary and neither good or bad.

Desires of survival need to exist in a healthy balance. Too much craving for food, drink, sleep, exercise, rest etc, creates an imbalance. Often times shining the light of awareness on desires or being aware of them and their causes is the first step in managing them. For people with strong minds, just having an intention for balance is enough to manifest a sense of balance in all survival related desires.

A similar process applies for desires related to evolution (reproduction, procreation optimisation, etc). That which is necessary needs to be performed, impurities that created excessive craving for any of the desires of survival or evolution need to be observed, contemplated upon and removed. The associated desires will automatically disappear as well as the person will get rid of the impurities.

Another big category of desires are the desires that one has adopted. These desires start disappearing once it is known that these were never really mine but were adopted. Understanding the root cause of these desires will often get rid of them or manage them out. If that does not happen, shining the light of awareness and contemplation on them will certainly manage them out.

Desires imposed on a person by friends, family or society are more complex and can have a detrimental impact on a person's relationships if not managed appropriately. Once a root cause of an imposed desire or driver of a desire is understood through the above techniques, in another person, it is much easier to address it through communication, negotiation and agreement. This may not be possible under all circumstances, especially where the one imposing their desires is in a position of power and will not agree to relinquishing their desire or their expectation. In such cases it is best to be aware of the desires and discard them when not required. Of course in most cases if imposed desires have become adopted by a person sometime in the distant past then being aware of them, acknowledging and accepting the desires can often times make them disappear.

The above desires are relatively easy to manage once their source is known, the scenario in which they are triggered is understood and the relevance or irrelevance of them is established. However desires that have originated from ones own actions are more persistent and need to be fulfilled. These desires can be postponed, but eventually they will keep on appearing time and again until they are fulfilled or rationalised away without suppression.

What happens to desires that are suppressed and how do I recognise them ?

Desires that are suppressed are like a "jack in the box" which will always reappear. The stronger the suppression the more strongly they reappear. Suppressed desires are noticeable by the stubborn consistency they keep on reappearing until they are fulfilled. A person who has consistent craving for food, for attention, for luxury items has had these desires of their suppressed in the past, which results in persistence of these desires even after they have been fulfilled. Persistent desires are particularly hard to get rid of as even fulfilling them will not get rid of the desire. The desire has become embedded as a habit or in some cases an addiction in the person, hence a more dramatic action may be required. This is true of desires related to consumption of intoxicating substances and drugs. 

What can I do to free myself from desires that have resulted in addictions ?

Removing addictions is a complex topic, however at a high level some strategies that can be used are - 

• consult a medical practitioner to have the addiction appropriately assessed and diagnosed.
• consult a specialist that specialises in dealing with the specific addiction (i.e. nutritionist for food related addictions).
• consult a psychologist who may assist in reversing or replacing the addictive habits with more health habits.

How can I avoid collecting desires based on my actions, is it even possible ?

It is absolutely possible to avoid generating new desires based on ones actions. Once it is understood that a mind body structure which contains even the smallest semblance of a discrete egoic identity, will have desires that will manifest and flourish, it is easy to deal with desires. For instance for desires to be accumulated an anchor such as the egoic identity is required. To reduce the impact of desires that have been accumulated over time or avoid generating new desires, letting go of the egoic identity is the easiest option. However as long as a human exists, there will always be some level of egoic identity for survival and evolutionary purposes. So the best option is to remain in awareness of the self or in a state of presence.

Being in a state of awareness detaches the self / experiencer from that which is experienced and as such frees the self from the bondage of doer ship or the consequences of ones actions / desires.

Similarly being in a state of presence also absolves one of the results of their actions, as these actions and thus manifested desires are carried out in a state of surrender, with no ownership attached to the egoic identity.       

Kabir Das a 15th century Indian mystic and saint summed up the benefit of managing desires in one of his poems.

Chaha gayi chinta miti manua beparwah

Jinko kachu na chahiye, woh shahon ke shah

When the desire goes, anxiety disappears and the mind becomes blasé / heedless

The one who wants nothing or desires nothing, he becomes the king of all kings

Once the self is realised, there is nothing to know, nothing to desire and true freedom from bondage caused by desires is achieved.

In summary desires are natural for survival and evolution and if unmanaged can result in suffering, however with proper understanding desires can have their impacts managed.

As rightly pointed by Rumi below once you know your self all other desires will end. 

  

 

Illusion ( part 2) - Happiness (3)

 

Some time back Jill met with a girl at work who could not get over her skiing holiday and wanted to take it up full time. Jill asked her what it was she loved about skiing.

She said "when I am skiing I am extremely happy".

Jill asked "can you describe what this extreme happiness feels like".

She said "in that state of extreme happiness I was totally alert, ecstatic, all my attention was on the skiing, every cell of my body was in that moment. I was just 'present'”.

Jill asked her how wonderful would it be if she could be present without going on skiing. She thought hard and said possibly and said "then I wouldn’t have to go on an expensive skiing holiday to be happy, I could be happy all the time".

Jill said "perhaps you should try to be present without the skiing experience. Give it a go".

A month had passed, when Jill met her again and she said "you will be surprised to know what has happened".

Jill said "what happened".

She said "I had been practising being present since we last spoke and I have observed I am a lot calmer, my stress level has gone down and I am enjoying my work. I no longer think about skiing or my next holiday or how to be happy. The most amazing thing is that when I am in the present I have no concept of time. I am still not as present as I am when skiing but I have started my journey on being present and I am no longer fully dependent on an experience to make me happy".

In the above story the description that was provided to Jill of this extreme happiness is what some people in a spiritual context refer to as bliss.

So what is the difference between happiness and bliss ?

If you ask any person on the street what is the difference between happiness and bliss, they will say happiness is temporary, while bliss is more deeper and permanent. It is evident from the above story that what was described to Jill by the girl she met at work was very intense and could be called bliss. The dictionary calls bliss perfect happiness. Whether we use the word happiness or bliss, it is clear everyone is seeking bliss, everyone wants to be always happy. Colloquially speaking though people tend to associate the word happiness with an object, or a situation or an experience that release hormones in their body to make them happy. Similarly bliss is used to describe an intense state of happiness. However the illusion continues to persist with everyone believing that the cause of happiness and bliss is an experience. So it is the endless cycle of running after all types of exotic experiences starts and one gets trapped in this illusion.

How can I get out of this illusion ?

Jill and her work colleague have clearly figured out that state of bliss arises not from the experience, but from a natural state of 'being' wherein the person experiencing the experience is dissolved to such an extent that the one that is experiencing and that which is experienced is merged and only the experiencing remains.

You cannot get out of the illusion, because you are part of it, however you can be aware of it and not get entangled in it. The below will help overcome it -

1. Knowledge that all that appears is ever changing and an illusion.
2. Knowledge that, that to which all the experiences appear is the self or the experiencer and is unchanging.
3. The knowledge that, that which one experiences is not the cause of true happiness or bliss.
4. Full and complete attention on the experience in front of you (the nature or type of experience is not relevant), in a state of awareness that you are the experiencer, until all that remains is this alert aware presence and all boundaries of experience and experiencer disappear. 

In summary that which we mistakenly assume (experiences) as the source of happiness and bliss is an ever changing illusion and is in fact a cause of much suffering. To abide in a state of bliss we must initially cultivate discrimination and awareness, until we finally become who we truly are "bliss".

 

Illusion ( part 2) - Happiness (2)

 

As Jack sat in the park after his morning walk. His wife Jill came and slumped next to him. Jill had completed her 30-minute jog. Jill said she was not happy in life. Jack looked up at her in sheer disbelief since she seemed to have the best of everything in life.

"Why do you think so?" asked Jack.

"I don't know. Everyone tells I have everything needed, but I am not happy" said Jill.

Jack questioned himself, whether he was happy. "No," was his inner voice reply. Now, that was an eye-opener for Jack. Jack began his quest to understand the real cause of his unhappiness, he couldn't find one.

Jack dug deeper, read articles, spoke to life coaches but nothing made sense. At last his doctor friend gave him a hormonal answer which put all his immediate questions and doubts to rest.

The doctor said that there are four hormones which determine a human's happiness - Endorphins, Dopamine, Serotonin, and Oxytocin. It is important we understand these hormones, as we need all four of them to stay happy.

Let's look at the first hormone the Endorphins. When we exercise, the body releases Endorphins. This hormone helps the body cope with the pain of exercising. We then enjoy exercising because these Endorphins will make us happy. Laughter is another good way of generating Endorphins. We need to spend 30 minutes exercising every day, read or watch funny stuff to get our day's dose of Endorphins.

The second hormone is Dopamine. In our journey of life, we accomplish many little and big tasks, it releases various levels of Dopamine. When we get appreciated for our work at the office or at home, we feel accomplished and good, that is because it releases Dopamine. This also explains why most housewives are unhappy since they rarely get acknowledged or appreciated for their work. Once, we join work, we buy a car, a house, the latest gadgets, a new house so forth. In each instance, it releases Dopamine and we become happy. Now, do we realize why we become happy when we shop?

The third hormone Serotonin is released when we act in a way that benefits others. When we transcend ourselves and give back to others or to nature or to the society, it releases Serotonin. Even, providing useful information on the internet like writing information blogs, answering people's questions on Quora or Facebook groups will generate Serotonin. That is because we will use our precious time to help other people via our answers or articles.

The final hormone is Oxytocin, is released when we become close to other human beings. When we hug our friends or family Oxytocin is released. Similarly, when we shake hands or put our arms around someone's shoulders, various amounts of Oxytocin is released.

Now, we can understand why we need to hug a child who has a bad mood. So, it is simple, we have to exercise every day to get Endorphins, we have to accomplish little goals and get Dopamine, we need to be nice to others to get Serotonin and finally hug our kids, friends, and families to get Oxytocin and we will be happy. When we are happy, we can deal with our challenges and problems better.

The above story from Jack and Jill provides an insight into what happens at a hormonal level in a human body.

Based on this if I generate the above hormones through exercise, accomplishing goals, being nice and hugging friends and family then I should be happy right ?

No not exactly. Exercising, accomplishing goals, being nice and hugging friends and family are activities that generate certain feel good thoughts due to the conditioning that has been developed over time in a human brain. Certain thoughts through conditioning are more likeable than others and these thoughts are associated with a release of hormones such as Oxytocin, Dopamine and Serotonin, which in turn are linked to emotions and feelings of happiness. If the conditioning that a desirable activity makes you happy is changed to an undesirable activity, then an undesirable activity (as long as you replace the previous conditioning) can have the same effect on the hormones.

This is the amazing story of the illusion that, that which appears to make one happy is in actual fact only a conditioning or an association that can be completely rewired. 

Does that mean I can change what experiences trigger the above hormones if I retrain my mind ?

Absolutely you can. It is a well known fact that thoughts need hormones to change the physiology of a being. Changing the source can change the end result, but let us explore how to do that in the next post.

Illusion ( part 2) - Happiness (1)

 

Ever wondered what gives you happiness ?

Going on a holiday to a much talked about holiday destination.

Buying that brand of a bag.

Buying that exquisite piece of jewellery.

Buying a sports car or the latest bike.

Building a new house.

Getting the latest phone or laptop.

Or the latest fashion accessories.

Or it could be having your favourite dish.

The list goes on and on. It is a long list right, and one thing is certain the list is ever changing

Ever wondered if other than effectively managing this list could there may be another way to happiness.

If so worth examining a few things -

• Novelty or newness is directly proportional to happiness. New experiences make you more happy than repeat of the same or old experiences. As the novelty of an experience or object wears off so does your happiness related to it reduce.

• However not all novel experiences  or objects make you happy, it is only those that you desire or unexpectedly delight you in a pleasant way that make you happy.

 

• Happiness is not dependent on an object or an experience. If that was the case than buying the same phone or dress should make you equally happy every time.

 

• Happiness is felt within you and Leading from the above it at least appears to be triggered by your internal state of desires and hence is dependent on your internal state.

 

• Next time you are happy just observe and be aware what is making you happy. You will discover you become happy when your attention is focussed. It occurs when you are in a state of near thoughtlessness. No thoughts about past nor future, you are totally in the moment. When you get something you desire or experience nature or are on a holiday for the briefest of moments you become totally present that is what gives you happiness as opposed to what you did.

We are inherently happy, but the happiness is covered up by our ego, our desires our thoughts of past and future. In the instant your desire is fulfilled, for the briefest moment you experience happiness because the mind stops and becomes totally present. The fact is you don’t need to do anything to be happy.

Happiness cannot be found either in the future ( if I do this I will be happy) or the past (when I did this or that in the past I was happy). Happiness is always there when you are totally present.

So if you want to be happy let go of all the experiences, objects and the thoughts that are distracting you from the true happiness that you already are. All that is required is to wipe off the dust (past and future thoughts) from your mirror of self and your happy self will reflect back and shine through. Initially all that is required is one or two experiences of the blissful self and once you have a taste then you will vigorously wipe off the rest of the dust. Happy dusting off😀